Jeans

I have reached a point in my life where I am comfortable with my size. I can finally say that my worth as a person is not defined by the size of my pants (yes mom, you read that right...it only took 28 years of you telling me that for me to believe you). And although the number on my jeans does not define my self-worth, it would be nice if I knew what that number was. Some of my jeans are so tight I can barely breathe (not to mention the muffin-top that results) and others of the same size are so loose I can pull them off without undoing the zipper. Men's pants are much easier...you are either a 37 waist or you're not. But I guess women don't like to see 37 on their pants, they'd much prefer to see a smaller, preferably single-digit, number. So I guess for now I'll continue to be a 6/8/10 and avoid pants shopping at all costs.

Time to Cool Off

There is a pile of wet clothes in my entry way. This is because I was in a dreadful funk this evening. Mid-conversation with Matt, I realized that something needed to change, so I got up, opened the front door, and dove face first into a snow pile.

I walked back in giggling and dripping snow from my eyelashes. After explaining what I had done and why, Matt asked, "Did it work?"
"Almost. I may need another dip."
So we both took another dive into the snow.

Blogworthy

All day long I think in terms of blogging...I am constantly evaluating actions/interactions/activities for their blog-worthiness. But then I get home from work, eat, snuggle, and my motivation to do anything other than the absolutely necessary fades. I promise that we do things, interesting things. I promise that I have thoughts, some of them even novel and occasionally funny. Well, you'll just have to take my word for it.

Especially since this week we've been trying to get back into our normal routine. It's Thursday and it was the first day that Ally made it to school at all. We didn't get home from our trip until about 3 am Monday morning, so we let her sleep in and unfortunately, both girls have been fighting their bedtimes this week thanks to our vacation. But what a great vacation it was. I was not ready to go back to work Monday morning (especially since I only got about 4 hours of sleep). All I can say is that I have increasing respect for single mothers and for my friends whose husbands travel...how do you do it??!? Without Matt, our family could not function. And since Ally thinks he is the only one capable of getting her dressed, changing her diaper, feeding her, etc., Ally especially would be hungry and naked without him.

Experience, Please

I am learning the value of experience. Two years ago when I began looking for a real job, I was highly disappointed at the lack of job opportunities presented to me. After all, I had an advanced degree, shouldn't companies be chomping at the bit to hire me? Over and over again I was told I didn't have enough experience. Frustrated, I wondered how I would ever get that experience since no one would hire me? One person told me, after letting me know they were going with another candidate, that the chosen person was "where [I] would be in five years." In five years, I'll be working at the makeup counter at Dillards because noone will hire me!

Fortunately, that is not the case. I have a great job although not in my field of study, but I did go through a slump at work where I felt very overwhelmed by the learning curve. It's still challenging work and I enjoy it, but I am relieved to have some experience under my belt.

Mostly, I've been thinking about experience as I face the ultimate challenge, parenthood. How in the world am I going to raise moral and valiant young women, while instilling in them values of kindness, generosity, and education, while still focusing on cultivating their individuality and creativity? Will my girls be dancers, singers, musicians, artists, teachers? How do I best discipline? How do I be supportive? How do I protect them without being overprotective?

At Grandpa Joe's birthday, I sat in the living room with two of my aunts and my mom. I was nursing Lily and mentioned that I needed to try to keep an eye on Ally because she was "sneaky." My aunt said, "Oh please. You have 3 experienced mothers in this room. We can outsmart a 3 year old." I regret not living closer to family so I can borrow from their experiences as I test out the waters of motherhood.

So Much Joy, So Little Time

To all the people who may have been infected by my daughter on the 3 hour bus ride from Madison to Chicago and again on the 3 hour plane ride from Chicago to Houston, I apologize. I promise I didn't know she was contagious.

A (thankfully) uneventful 3 hour bus ride/4 hour wait in the airport/3 hour plane ride with a 3 year old and 5 month old, I am eternally grateful that things went as smoothly as they did. I have learned some patience with motherhood, but I think the Almighty knows my patience isn't THAT tried and blesses me with calm children. So calm, in fact, that they do not tell me when they are sick. Christmas eve comes and Ally starts pulling on her ear and mentions that it hurts. This is the first she has mentioned it, and she's not cranky or running a fever, so I begin the internal debate as to whether or not to take her to the ER. I mean, it's not really an emergency but urgent care isn't open either and since our pediatrician resides in another state (oh, yeah and we are currently without a pediatrician as ours left the Dean Facility to practice closer to home). Sigh. To the ER it is.

Matt takes her in and fortunately they see her right away. The doctor tells Matt that she has very bad infections in BOTH ears and recommends a shot of antibiotics as well as a prescription for oral antibiotics. He cautions that the shot is painful, but necessary for a speedy recovery. Painful indeed, Ally comes home from the hospital limping! He also prescribes tylenol with codeine to "help her sleep." Apparently, codeine has the opposite effect on Ally as shortly thereafter she is literally running in circles in the living room. And the antibiotics are giving her diarrhea, but I guess we'll just ride that one out since I don't have a doctor to call to get a different prescription.

Otherwise, we are loving the warmer weather and mock all those who dare imply that 60 degrees is "cold."

Meet Santa

Did you know that you can chat with Santa live via webcam! (Thanks Debby!!)

http://www.thesquirrelcam.com/cam-popsanta.php

Up Up and Away

For anyone who follows my blog, I do apologize. I have been a bit on the boring side as of late. Unless you want to talk about e-prescribing implementations and the new requirement for discrete dispense. Today while at work, I got a call from Ally's school. I love conversations that begin with, "Sarah? Everything's fine, but..." Since Lily woke up this morning with a 102 degree fever, I was expecting Ally's teacher to tell me that she had perhaps gotten sick at school. Instead, I was told that another child bit her. She explained that they had taken Ally to the nurse, it didn't break skin, but she might have some bruising and they planned to call the other child's parents as well. I asked if she was doing OK and the teacher said that she was back to playing already. So I thought, no harm no foul, right? But when I got home, I saw this:


Wow! He really got her good, poor thing. I really hope this doesn't make her hate school. She is already so hard to get up in the morning, but usually has a good time once she's there. I wonder sometimes if I'm doing the right thing by making her go. I remember telling my mom how much I hated public school and begging to be home schooled. She wouldn't. But it was good for me, right?

So worrying about my 5 month old's cold and my 3 year old's emotional well-being, not to mention that I made the mistake of watching Gangland last night on the History channel and I've been a little on-edge today. I spent a good while reading cakewrecks this evening. Any other thoughts on how to reduce my anxiety?